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A Jericho Fan Fiction Archive
Another chapter full of interesting character-building details and moments balancing between bitter and sweet. Since this one seemed kind of like an extended character study, in a sense, (compared to the more episodic structure of the previous chapter that I reviewed mostly chronologically), I figured I'd jump in and list a bunch of things I liked/thought about.
Quote: "Why not?" she replied, shrugging. "Actually, most of the things August was crushing on you for – and, trust me, she was perfectly happy to tell me what those things were – are things you and Jeff have in common," Heather explained. Jake made a strangled noise at that, eliciting a soft giggle from his wife. "I thought it was a little weird at first, too," she admitted, "But I think it might actually work out as long as, you know, August could get to Jericho."
This was sweet – Heather setting up her brother's brother with her sister's sister – but with your trademark blend of finding the sweet in the moments of solemn, and solemn in the sweet. I like the way this network of family and friends has expanded throughout the series, and we've gotten to know characters, even ones like August who've never appeared on page, bit by bit.
Jake's dreams for taking over the ranch, and his reflection on the way his dreams and bigger dreams in general have changed and the ways they can still be realized, were neat continuing development for him. I loved that his horse is named Agamemnon. That's a horse that seems destined for a tragic end if there ever was one, though.
Quote: "Okay," Heather agreed, "I can see that. What mattered before, what matters now…" she sighed, "Sometimes it feels like two different universes."
Okay, this, taken in context, is telling and sad, but I have to admit I laughed. As a character from one of my other favourite shows would say, meta meta meta.
Quote: "It's not exciting or shocking or anything, Jake," Heather warned, "I mean, you could probably guess…." They watched one another for a long moment before she shrugged and confessed, "I wanna see my dad, I wanna wake up some morning and find out that he's here – that he's come to Jericho. Like Mikey did. Like April wants August and Autumn to do. That's all."
I want them to all show up in town some morning too! Even though that probably wouldn't make sense, by the laws of probability or storytelling. I like how you remind us that though this group of survivors is a fairly tight community full of twisty connections, rivalries, and common interests, they are still also very connected (or suffering from a loss of connection to) the outside world, with the thousands of individuals in town all possessing their own branches of friends, family, coworkers, ex-lovers, childhood teachers, sports rivals, etc., that extend outward. The show dealt with this occasionally but not really as much as you might expect for how many apparently single, parentless and childless characters there were. I know, narrative focus and visual medium and stuff, but it is really neat that you can show us this part of the characters, the parts of them that are with their loved ones, somewhere out there.
Quote: "You have now officially met every relative – by blood, marriage or shirt tail – that I have," Heather declared, looking around the banquet room at the Lisinski family's favorite German restaurant. "At least everyone who's within a two hour radius tonight," she amended, wrapping her arms around his neck in order to press a quick kiss to his mouth. "Seriously, Jake, thank you," she murmured.
Placing his hands on her hips, Jake drew Heather even closer, telling her, "Seriously, you don't have to thank me. This was easy and kinda fun. Way better than skating," he teased, kissing her in return. "Though I hafta admit, I don't remember half their names."
Sounds like a real extended family party! Having witnessed a few instances of outsiders introduced to my big extended family recently, I have to say I think Jake handled it like a trouper. Even though Heather's family is fun, any huge group with their own rules and culture, checking you out at all once, is bound to be overwhelming. Especially the names! It's been neat seeing Jake as the fish-out-of-water, and his reactions to being in that space and ways he adapts, throughout this part of the story.
I had to aw at Joe the engagement party planner. I would say man after my own heart, but I feel like I keep assigning that label to characters in all my reviews and it's going to start sounding cheap. I will say, he is a super sweet dad and dad-in-law-to-be. His enthusiasm for his daughter's new love and his support and encouragement of her plans are among my favourite parts of the Lisinski family scenes. It's also kind of neat, the contrast between him and Johnston, two very different kinds of fathers who are ultimately so dedicated to their children. I assume we'll probably see the dads in a scene together at some point right?
Quote: "FYI, priest at seven o'clock," Michael warned, sidling up beside them. "Might wanna tone down the kissy-kissy thing."
"Mikey," Heather growled, though both she and Jake glanced over their shoulders to see her father and her uncle Leo – actually her father's cousin, but as she'd explained to Jake earlier, "We've always called him Uncle Leo" – heading toward them. She found his hand with her own and, leaning against his arm, whispered against the fabric of his dress shirt, "I'm pretty sure this is interfering."
And my obligatory “aw, Mikey!” moment. In seriousness, it is nice to see Mikey in his lighter, more well-fed days. A nice contrast to where he was at when we last saw him, coming home with the stench of desperation on his clothes and the weight of a town secret on his shoulders. I was thinking about the Lisinskis not in town, and while from a character empathy feeling standpoint, I am wanting them all to be okay, I think Mikey really is the most interesting one, narratively, to have survived and made the trek to Jericho, because we get to see him moving across this sort of in-between, transitional time, literally going from a kid in the flashbacks to an adult in the present. Being so young in the flashback, not being as set in who he's going to be yet (unlike his brothers, who have settled into their life paths a bit more), I think, and really being a still fairly young adult in the present, it is neat to see him observing and absorbing all the things he's encountering in this weird scary world he's found himself in. Not that this doesn't happen of course with all the characters, but Mikey, because he occupies this slightly more liminal space, can sort of be the ultimate example of a person growing into a new identity for the new world. And that's kind of the role that Heather plays in the canon story, I think, whereas here she's the older and more settled sibling, doing her own adapting of course, but fairly solid in who she is and where she belongs and fits in as well.
Also have to say, Uncle Leo was pretty cool. I have a few priests in my extended family/friends network and it reminded me of those times when I was little and we'd have our distant relative/family friend priest over and all the kids would be totally amazed to see him drinking a beer and cracking jokes with everyone else. Of course we didn't have a close uncle who was a priest, so it wasn't as common an experience for us as for Heather. I liked how Uncle Leo was open and good-humoured with the happy couple. Also generous with his advice, though I guess getting to advise a beloved niece about a positive life event is probably a much happier kind of thing to do than to get asked about all kinds of medical problems, like a doctor gets.
So...Mark is not so gifted with the basic social skills is he? Like, at all. Or basic survival skills. I guess we probably shouldn't be putting him on the 'most likely to have survived in Buffalo' list. Actually though, this has made me think about the survival advantage of having social skills (seriously, just had a long meandering contemplation about it in my head, thinking about how they're portrayed and who has them and who depends on them more and what their limits are, on the show and in the story, neat stuff). So I guess he's good for inspiring thoughts about interesting things, but I'm glad Heather seems to have steered away from the man himself forever more.
Quote: "Jake, Tommy taught me how to swear like – well, like a hockey player when I was eight," Heather informed him. "And I actually have yet to encounter a new-to-me curse word since." Chuckling at his incredulous expression, she kissed him on the cheek. "He wasn't too smart about it though, 'cause he taught me what to say, and then he had me do it for all his friends which left them howling of course…. But he forgot to tell me not to do it for my dad."
Haha. I like Tommy. He's such a classic big brother. I also like when we get little moments from Heather's past, and this whole part of the story, going home with Heather and meeting parts of her history, have been fun and a nice addition and contrast to the more Jake-history-centric (by necessity, since he does have a longer history there for sure) scenes in Jericho past.
Quote: Taking the lantern with her, Heather headed to the bathroom first, hurrying through her dental hygiene routine. There was real toothpaste again, a small tube from the airdrop that still needed to be conserved, but that was a million times better than the two weeks they had gone completely without – not that there had been much to eat, or much to brush away.
I feel weird because my first reaction to this was “Eek the bacteria!” I don't know why the slow decay of undernourished teeth bothers me more than the squalid tank of desperation, but it really does. And there are so many worse things going on in their world too. I think your reminders of these little details really help to drive home all the texture of the totally new world they're living in, and all the little things to adapt to.
Quote: "Heather, I really didn't," Jake insisted, wrapping a lock of her hair around his finger. "She was standin' right in front of me, in her helmet and BDUs and I just thought she was some scrawny teenager who'd probably just gone through basic before everything happened, and had never managed to really buff up," he explained. "I didn't know she was female until I heard her talk."
Poor Maggie! I know this is what Jake had to say (and true for him – well, I'm not him but I assume, and glad Heather is no longer feeling that dip in self esteem) but poor girl can't catch a break. Again though, I guess this is the least of her troubles now. Now I'm thinking of her, off in New Bern (she's the character I think really shows the limits of social skills in the new world but that's a discussion for another time), and I guess we'll probably be seeing her again soon. It's probably silly to say I hope things go okay for her right? Right...it's not for the writer to make everything sunshine and rainbows, but maybe it is okay if we readers wish for all the good (if unlikely) things for the characters.
Okay, this happened throughout so I don't have a specific quote, but I was enjoying the sort of humorous back-and-forth exchanges between Jake and Heather that are sometimes suggestive, teasing, ultimately double entendres originally meant in serious contexts. I was going to say “they really are an odd couple, aren't they?” but I didn't know if that would sound right. What I mean in a good (classic) way is, I love pairs of characters that have a solid contrasting/complementary thing going on. It makes these kind of moments where they play off each other lively and fun. And with Jake and Heather here, it's like they know each other well enough to go to this playful place, and then find different levels of meaning in the things they're saying, sometimes flirtatious but sometimes more emotional.
Well done, and I look forward to the next part (while bracing myself as I assume there won't be all sunshine and rainbows).
Penny,
Thank you so much for the thoughtful and detailed review. I really appreciate it, and probably spent more time than I should have re-reading and contemplating your comments. Though maybe not…. You always bring up questions that I haven't thought of, and that then get incorporated at some point into the story. So, thank you, from the bottom of my heart.
Quote: Another chapter full of interesting character-building details and moments balancing between bitter and sweet.
Aw, this alone made my day, so thank you again!
Quote: Jake's dreams for taking over the ranch, and his reflection on the way his dreams and bigger dreams in general have changed and the ways they can still be realized, were neat continuing development for him. I loved that his horse is named Agamemnon. That's a horse that seems destined for a tragic end if there ever was one, though.
I'm glad you feel this way. I can't say that this is exactly the Jake I had in mind when I began this little adventure (back when I was thinking it would be, oh, four or five parts) but I realized that this is where he needs to go for this all to make sense. His motivation for slogging through everything so far has to be the life he was planning, and obviously DC Jake is a little bit different from canon Jake. Though I think even canon Jake might have been interested in taking over EJ's legacy. As for Agamemnon, I have to admit I have not yet considered his fate particularly, only the fate of the Greens' horses generally. I will have to put that on the figure out list.
Quote: "Okay," Heather agreed, "I can see that. What mattered before, what matters now…" she sighed, "Sometimes it feels like two different universes."
Okay, this, taken in context, is telling and sad, but I have to admit I laughed. As a character from one of my other favourite shows would say, meta meta meta.
:-) Well, I do try to keep a small undercurrent of humor running through the story at all times, just to keep myself from bogging down too much. And, I must admit, I could have gone with "two different worlds" or something else, I'm sure, but I thought "universes" was the way to go in an alternate universe story after all. (And "meta" is a word that had lots of meaning in my life these days too. So you made me laugh!)
Quote: "It's not exciting or shocking or anything, Jake," Heather warned, "I mean, you could probably guess…." They watched one another for a long moment before she shrugged and confessed, "I wanna see my dad, I wanna wake up some morning and find out that he's here – that he's come to Jericho. Like Mikey did. Like April wants August and Autumn to do. That's all."
I want them to all show up in town some morning too! Even though that probably wouldn't make sense, by the laws of probability or storytelling. I like how you remind us that though this group of survivors is a fairly tight community full of twisty connections, rivalries, and common interests, they are still also very connected (or suffering from a loss of connection to) the outside world, with the thousands of individuals in town all possessing their own branches of friends, family, coworkers, ex-lovers, childhood teachers, sports rivals, etc., that extend outward.
Well, the laws of probability and story-telling are hard to get around, but what I can say is that some Lisinskis (though definitely not all) will survive, and will reconnect with their family in Kansas at some point. I have to admit that it was a rough week as I figured out everyone's fates, a week that I basically spent close to tears a lot of the time… they're like family to me now, so figuring out who died and when and how... that was rough.
Quote: I had to aw at Joe the engagement party planner. I would say man after my own heart, but I feel like I keep assigning that label to characters in all my reviews and it's going to start sounding cheap. I will say, he is a super sweet dad and dad-in-law-to-be. His enthusiasm for his daughter's new love and his support and encouragement of her plans are among my favourite parts of the Lisinski family scenes. It's also kind of neat, the contrast between him and Johnston, two very different kinds of fathers who are ultimately so dedicated to their children. I assume we'll probably see the dads in a scene together at some point right?
I hope I didn't over-do with Joe's transformation from a sceptic to a proud supporter of the engagement. It was quick, but I think it was clear to Joe that Heather and Jake were in love, and fighting that wasn't the way to maintain the very important to him relationship with his daughter. Plus, I think, having gotten to know Jake some, he does like him. And, yes, you are correct that there will eventually be scenes with the dads, multiple probably. And, random tidbit that may not ever actually make it onto the page/screen in DC, but Johnston and Joe are good enough buddies in the end that they start a running game of internet checkers that goes for years after H&J's wedding.
Quote: Also have to say, Uncle Leo was pretty cool. I have a few priests in my extended family/friends network and it reminded me of those times when I was little and we'd have our distant relative/family friend priest over and all the kids would be totally amazed to see him drinking a beer and cracking jokes with everyone else. Of course we didn't have a close uncle who was a priest, so it wasn't as common an experience for us as for Heather. I liked how Uncle Leo was open and good-humoured with the happy couple. Also generous with his advice, though I guess getting to advise a beloved niece about a positive life event is probably a much happier kind of thing to do than to get asked about all kinds of medical problems, like a doctor gets.
This is exactly what I was going for with Uncle Leo, so I am going to take your comment to mean I was successful. In fact, I picture Uncle Leo at family events, drinking beer and cracking jokes. He's from the other side of the family than Jess, but I'm sure the Lisinski and Schulze sides mixed on occasion, so I like to think that Uncle Leo came across Jess playing priest and performing wedding ceremonies back when, and unlike her mother, he thought it was amusing and gave her a little professional advice.
Quote: So...Mark is not so gifted with the basic social skills is he? Like, at all. Or basic survival skills. I guess we probably shouldn't be putting him on the 'most likely to have survived in Buffalo' list. Actually though, this has made me think about the survival advantage of having social skills (seriously, just had a long meandering contemplation about it in my head, thinking about how they're portrayed and who has them and who depends on them more and what their limits are, on the show and in the story, neat stuff). So I guess he's good for inspiring thoughts about interesting things, but I'm glad Heather seems to have steered away from the man himself forever more.
While I agree that Mark does not take rejection well and has some social skill issues, I don't think he was always the world's biggest jerk. Heather wouldn't have dated him as long as she did if he was only a JERK. He just really didn't handle rejection well, and so that ogre side that she probably sensed in him (one of the many reasons she kept him at arm's length) came out in spades. But Heather does think she lead him on a little bit, and while that doesn't excuse his reaction she still feels somewhat guilty for how things turned out between them. Jake of course has none of her reservations! And, yes, while Heather has dodged that particular bullet I can tell you that Mark does make one more appearance in Different Circumstances…. You'll just have to keep reading to see when. ;-)
Now that the specific example is out of the way, I still need to address the brilliant and intriguing idea that social skills translate into survival skills, because it is so true. People aren't going to go out of their way to help someone they loathe survive in this new world. Karen Harper killed herself and her family because she was too proud to ask for help – and probably knew that she didn't really have anyone she could go to because she didn't have any real friends. I'm not saying that the Greens wouldn't have helped, but they probably would have been gritting their teeth the whole time. So yes, there's a Venn diagram somewhere that shows the most successful people in this world have themselves both some survival and some social skills, I'm sure.
Quote: "Jake, Tommy taught me how to swear like – well, like a hockey player when I was eight," Heather informed him. "And I actually have yet to encounter a new-to-me curse word since." Chuckling at his incredulous expression, she kissed him on the cheek. "He wasn't too smart about it though, 'cause he taught me what to say, and then he had me do it for all his friends which left them howling of course…. But he forgot to tell me not to do it for my dad."
Haha. I like Tommy. He's such a classic big brother. I also like when we get little moments from Heather's past, and this whole part of the story, going home with Heather and meeting parts of her history, have been fun and a nice addition and contrast to the more Jake-history-centric (by necessity, since he does have a longer history there for sure) scenes in Jericho past.
Well, clearly, I love the Lisinskis, so I am glad that they seem to have been well-received, or at least no one has said that they're boring and need to get off their computer screen. The lack of a past for Heather (I don't count "Oh hey! I forgot to mention these last three months that I grew up in New Bern and I have friends there that I love but really didn't worry about all this time…" as a past for Heather, sorry Jericho producers and writing staff) left me open to fill in as much as I wanted. It's been fun for me, that's for sure. And, of course, we will see the Lisinskis again in the DC Past…. They all will be attending the wedding after all.
Quote: "Heather, I really didn't," Jake insisted, wrapping a lock of her hair around his finger. "She was standin' right in front of me, in her helmet and BDUs and I just thought she was some scrawny teenager who'd probably just gone through basic before everything happened, and had never managed to really buff up," he explained. "I didn't know she was female until I heard her talk."
Poor Maggie! I know this is what Jake had to say (and true for him – well, I'm not him but I assume, and glad Heather is no longer feeling that dip in self esteem) but poor girl can't catch a break. Again though, I guess this is the least of her troubles now. Now I'm thinking of her, off in New Bern (she's the character I think really shows the limits of social skills in the new world but that's a discussion for another time), and I guess we'll probably be seeing her again soon. It's probably silly to say I hope things go okay for her right? Right...it's not for the writer to make everything sunshine and rainbows, but maybe it is okay if we readers wish for all the good (if unlikely) things for the characters.
In hindsight this does feel like one more mean thing to do to poor Maggie. But it's one of those things I took from canon (and those are getting fewer and fewer for me) so let's blame the writers and producers who set that scene up so that the big "gotcha" is that one of the marines is <gasp> a woman. And we will see Maggie again… in a jail cell in New Bern, I believe.
Quote: Okay, this happened throughout so I don't have a specific quote, but I was enjoying the sort of humorous back-and-forth exchanges between Jake and Heather that are sometimes suggestive, teasing, ultimately double entendres originally meant in serious contexts. I was going to say “they really are an odd couple, aren't they?” but I didn't know if that would sound right. What I mean in a good (classic) way is, I love pairs of characters that have a solid contrasting/complementary thing going on. It makes these kind of moments where they play off each other lively and fun. And with Jake and Heather here, it's like they know each other well enough to go to this playful place, and then find different levels of meaning in the things they're saying, sometimes flirtatious but sometimes more emotional.
Well, thank you! Seriously, you left me a plethora of lovely compliments that warm the cockles of my fanfic writing heart, but this is the one that really makes me happy. For this story to work, I think this is the Jake and Heather I need to present – a couple that know each other well, that both like each other AND love one another, a couple that has fun together, enjoys being together, and is each other's biggest fan. Idealized, perhaps, but that's how I'm proceeding.
Quote: Well done, and I look forward to the next part (while bracing myself as I assume there won't be all sunshine and rainbows).
Yeah, the sunshine and rainbows I ordered didn't seem to ever arrive. :-( Personally, I've been bracing myself for writing of the next part of Different Circumstances ever since I saw Winter's End for the first time, sitting in my room in a Holiday Inn Express, on a business trip. I'm sure it's a coincidence, but I got very sick that night, so the whole trip was miserable. Anyway, bracing yourself is a good choice.
Excellent continuation of your triumphant return, Marzee!
As usual, I love all the little human touches of humour and pathos you weave through present scenes that revisit things we already know and a few that we haven't seen.
In the opening, I liked those little character moments that set each person apart with an individual point of view - Johnston reflecting on feeling cold just from looking at his poor, heroic son, Zack wanting a chance to drive the tank, and Mikey, who's experienced so many weird and scary things and really, a post-apocalyptic coming of age (does it count if one has surpassed teenagehood? A post-apocalyptic roughening anyway), feeling relieved at Zack's still youthful playfulness, despite his ease with a weapon.
I also really loved how you showed us Stanley the good friend, knowing Jake enough to know to take care around him, reading the signs and trying to anticipate what his friend needs. I also liked the return, later in the chapter, of their friendship (or I guess the spectre of their friendship), both in the story of their live-to-one-hundred pact (they wanted to outlive everyone who could tell them what to do, and I wonder if they will reflect on this ever in the trying times ahead when they are in charge of their own difficult situations), and in Jake's conversations with his future brother-in-law.
I also liked the balance between their closeness and their fairly recent distance in their conversation about Jake's big secret. Especially this:
Quote: It was the truth, but not the whole truth. He couldn't seem to force those words up out of his throat. I killed her. But Jake couldn't say it. He didn't want Stanley to know that about him – he didn't want anyone to know that about him, and it was bad enough that his father now knew, but he wasn't going to tell his best friend.
This is such a telling line in terms of Jake's character. He has this close relationship with his best friend, close enough to go this far, but his secretive side takes over and holds this darkest secret close still. Telling at its continuing impact on his life and that his life goals that he's willing to share and focus on are, at the moment, so far away from this horrible moment in the past and so close to his own friend's present goals of domestic, steady life. Also, Stanley loves French toast? Man after my own heart. Actually, I love pancakes too. I guess I'm torn.
The descriptions of the guys trying to handle the smell made me laugh at first, and then I felt bad. It gave those scenes all a nice texture, but really made me feel for the fake marines. The smell of desperation, super tangible, and a reminder of a kind of horror at what they'd done, but also a horror of what they'd experienced, is quite a motif I think. And a really neat kind of harbinger of what's to come, when we have these characters who observed and caught on to the fake marines, from a defensive position and one where they can still react with horror, actually descending into their vehicle and handling their violently-obtained gains of battle. And then all the terrible smells stay on their clothes, and I can't help but think and wonder about what kinds of (to them, now unimaginable) things they might have to do in the future and how they might have to get their hands dirty too. Of course, I only know how things happened in that other universe, but I assume things are still going to get darker for the poor denizens of DC Jericho before things get lighter.
Quote: "So – so none of it is true," Mimi decided, sighing tiredly. She could feel her eyes filling with tears, so she stared at her feet, willing it all to go away.
"We don't know what's true or not true," Jake said. "Maybe there was a war, maybe there wasn't. Maybe there's one president, maybe there's still six. Could go either way. We're just back where we were this morning, that's all."
Stanley reached for Mimi's hand squeezing it tightly. "Hey, Uncle Sam," he teased, "You'll still get to New York…. You just – just hafta hang out with us here a little longer, 'kay?"
"Right," she agreed after a long moment, clearing her throat. Blinking hard, Mimi raised her head and met his gaze. "I'm – I'm okay," she declared unconvincingly. "I'll be okay. I'm just gonna go up to the house, okay?"
Poor Mimi! I really felt for her and I think you've really nicely captured how she might react to this terrible news – her grief is openly tangible but she's also still enough of an independent player to need to sort it out alone for a while. This was a moment I'm glad we got to see here, as in a sense I think Mimi is getting dealt the biggest blow by this news (even though it's no picnic for everyone else), and it is neat to see her at this weird crossroads, where she's somewhat become part of the community, being included in the secret and acknowledged as attached to someone, but also still apart as she's understandably shaken by the loss of her chance to leave and return to her former way of life and comfort zone. I loved also how you showed Stanley caring for her in what he has come to sense is the right way for her. The Stanley and Bonnie moment, with the siblings at this antagonistic but still ultimately (somewhat, in the big picture) united moment, is just right too.
Quote: Michael didn't even bother looking back over his shoulder, settling instead for raising his hand in acknowledgment as he pushed through the door between the kitchen and dining room. "Yes, Miss Bossy Heather."
I was going to say “Poor Mikey!” but I realized that would be funny, about someone being told to take a shower, coming right after my sympathizing with Mimi finding out her hopes for her old life were dashed. I will say this brother-sister relationship continues to crack me up in the past and it is sweet in the present.
Quote: For the remainder of the afternoon, Heather had babied him – not that Jake had objected – retrieving his shoes from the locker they'd rented, bringing him coffee and Reese's from the snack bar, and even sneaking him a couple of Tylenol from her purse. Eventually, at his urging and her nieces' cajoling, she'd returned to the rink for a half hour or so, skating around the oval with the two little girls a few times before they'd ended up on the ice directly in front of him. They – Heather included – had shown him every trick they knew how to do on skates, while Jake had cheered and clapped. Finally, Andrew had told the girls that it was time to go, and Heather had decided that they needed to head over to John's and Kerry's for their dinner date.
I liked the descriptions of the rest of Jake and Heather's weekend visiting her family – it sounded like a perfect mix of fun and the occasional awkward moment. I especially liked the way Heather both did her best to help Jake acclimatize to his new role in her life and family, but also got her moments to shine in her natural (well, original) habitat, and got her turn on the ice!
Quote: "Yeah," April answered a few seconds later. "Yeah, tomorrow's okay. But, in general, my medical advice is to take it easy, okay? And," she continued, fixing a hard stare on Jake, "Avoid strenuous activities for the next few days, okay?"
"You're makin' Heather blush, you know," Jake returned blandly – and without bothering to look at his wife, who had pressed her face into his shoulder, most likely to hide her embarrassment.
Haha! I do like April's sense of humour. I like, too, the balance of levity and solemnity in the little moments between Jake and Heather in the present. It's also neat in this chapter to see the contrast between these two times in their lives, surrounded in the first by the family Heather grew up with and Jake is choosing to join, making the plans for their lives that seem in a sense far away, and in the second surrounded by Jake's and Heather's family, partly of origin and partly friends they have chosen, making new plans the best they can in a future that's even more tenuous but also tenable.
Nicely done and I look forward to the next chapter!
First of all, thank you so much for your review, Penny Lane. :-)
I could probably go through and respond to each and every line, but I will restrain myself and somehow stick to the "highlights".
Quote: In the opening, I liked those little character moments that set each person apart with an individual point of view - Johnston reflecting on feeling cold just from looking at his poor, heroic son, Zack wanting a chance to drive the tank, and Mikey, who's experienced so many weird and scary things and really, a post-apocalyptic coming of age (does it count if one has surpassed teenagehood? A post-apocalyptic roughening anyway), feeling relieved at Zack's still youthful playfulness, despite his ease with a weapon.
I definitely think that Mikey is having a post-apocalyptic coming of age – that is the perfect description of it, so thank you for that. Not that anyone expected the lives they've ended up with, but Mikey's is especially different from the one he imagined. Plus, after taking that one brave risk of travelling cross country to get to his sister (whom he thought was alone and possibly vulnerable out in Kansas) he's having to again and again make "brave choices" and finding that it's not so easy to do. So truly 'coming of age'.
Quote: I also liked the balance between their closeness and their fairly recent distance in their conversation about Jake's big secret.
This is such a telling line in terms of Jake's character. He has this close relationship with his best friend, close enough to go this far, but his secretive side takes over and holds this darkest secret close still. Telling at its continuing impact on his life and that his life goals that he's willing to share and focus on are, at the moment, so far away from this horrible moment in the past and so close to his own friend's present goals of domestic, steady life. Also, Stanley loves French toast? Man after my own heart. Actually, I love pancakes too. I guess I'm torn.
I just can't see Jake giving up this particular secret willingly. Add to that, that I have a head filled with DC backstory, one in which Jake's ultimate goal is a nice, quiet, family-oriented life – basically the opposite of his darkest secret, at least in his mind. This probably isn't the Jake that canon intends, but having lived with DC Jake running around my brain for so many years now, I will confess that I find mine more interesting. The stakes seem higher for him, and that's what interests me the most. As for breakfast, I'm torn too. I'll go with either of these guys if they're doing the cooking! ;-)
Quote: The descriptions of the guys trying to handle the smell made me laugh at first, and then I felt bad. It gave those scenes all a nice texture, but really made me feel for the fake marines. The smell of desperation, super tangible, and a reminder of a kind of horror at what they'd done, but also a horror of what they'd experienced, is quite a motif I think. And a really neat kind of harbinger of what's to come, when we have these characters who observed and caught on to the fake marines, from a defensive position and one where they can still react with horror, actually descending into their vehicle and handling their violently-obtained gains of battle. And then all the terrible smells stay on their clothes, and I can't help but think and wonder about what kinds of (to them, now unimaginable) things they might have to do in the future and how they might have to get their hands dirty too. Of course, I only know how things happened in that other universe, but I assume things are still going to get darker for the poor denizens of DC Jericho before things get lighter.
Thank you for using the word "motif". That truly made my day. To be honest, I first just thought that this group of people had been living out of this one vehicle for who knows how long, and of course wouldn't it smell? Then I thought about how much bigger that would make their secret, how it would increase the risk every time they tried their ruse once again. All it would take is one person sticking their head in the tank, and wouldn't they have some explaining to do? Anyway, I couldn't let it go once the idea occurred to me. As for the smell that permeates our heroes skin and clothes, I think most of it is in their heads… the little bit that Heather can smell on Jake is only because she knows exactly what he smells like normally. And, as for what's to come… well, I will just say that some of the details will stay the same, some will change…and you'll just have to keep reading if you want to know more! :-)
Quote: Poor Mimi! I really felt for her and I think you've really nicely captured how she might react to this terrible news – her grief is openly tangible but she's also still enough of an independent player to need to sort it out alone for a while. This was a moment I'm glad we got to see here, as in a sense I think Mimi is getting dealt the biggest blow by this news (even though it's no picnic for everyone else), and it is neat to see her at this weird crossroads, where she's somewhat become part of the community, being included in the secret and acknowledged as attached to someone, but also still apart as she's understandably shaken by the loss of her chance to leave and return to her former way of life and comfort zone.
Again, I'm glad you liked what I did for Mimi, another of your favorites. It seems pretty obvious that she was aware of the tank in the barn… so I thought it would be interesting to figure out how she would react to the news that the marines were a fake. So I'm glad you … not approve… but believe my suggestion of how things would go down.
Quote: Michael didn't even bother looking back over his shoulder, settling instead for raising his hand in acknowledgment as he pushed through the door between the kitchen and dining room. "Yes, Miss Bossy Heather."
I was going to say “Poor Mikey!” but I realized that would be funny, about someone being told to take a shower, coming right after my sympathizing with Mimi finding out her hopes for her old life were dashed. I will say this brother-sister relationship continues to crack me up in the past and it is sweet in the present.
:-) What can I say, Mikey is the little brother I always wanted, (gentle) name calling and all.
Quote: I liked the descriptions of the rest of Jake and Heather's weekend visiting her family – it sounded like a perfect mix of fun and the occasional awkward moment. I especially liked the way Heather both did her best to help Jake acclimatize to his new role in her life and family, but also got her moments to shine in her natural (well, original) habitat, and got her turn on the ice!
I have loved the interlude with the Lisinskis, really loved writing all these crazy, fun, loving original characters, so it's nice to hear that they ring true. And, yes, Heather does get her moment, doesn't she? I hadn't actually thought of that, but I am quite glad.
Quote: Haha! I do like April's sense of humour. I like, too, the balance of levity and solemnity in the little moments between Jake and Heather in the present. It's also neat in this chapter to see the contrast between these two times in their lives, surrounded in the first by the family Heather grew up with and Jake is choosing to join, making the plans for their lives that seem in a sense far away, and in the second surrounded by Jake's and Heather's family, partly of origin and partly friends they have chosen, making new plans the best they can in a future that's even more tenuous but also tenable.
Thanks. :-) April always seems so strained to me, I have to give her a moment here and there to roll her eyes or laugh at her friends. As for my favorite couple, I have decided (and just recently, oddly enough) that I'm committed to this story as it should be told, so canon be damned. I'm writing a Jake and Heather story, I won't make any apologies for that, and they will be as real and as united of a couple as I can manage to write.
Oh, just wonderful!! Loved it to pieces and can't wait for you to write more! I am so glad you are continuing your wonderful story.
I'm not sure if you ever got my message way back when (early 2012?) giving you credit for inspiration and asking if I could borrow a couple of themes. I have now been writing my own ridiculously long story for almost 2 years. It is posted at fanfiction dot net; please check it out if you ever have spare time :)
Thank you once again for writing!!
Thanks for reviewing, merryann! It's great to know that I still have readers interested from "way back".
I honestly don't remember if I got a message from you back during 2012, that was a rough year for me with both my parents ending up in the hospital within 9 days of each other. They are both doing well now, but it was a tough row to hoe as the primary caregiver for both of them, and fanfic took a definite back seat to icky real life.
That said, I did take a peek at your story one day, and did note a few homages to Different Circumstances, so thank you for that. :-)
Hooray! You're writing again, and I had enough internet access to find your new chapters & enjoy them. As per your usual, love every bit of it. Will try to review the next chapter from a computer (not a phone...) so I can leave a more detailed review.
It's great to see you're still with me, merryann. :-)
Glad to hear that you're enjoying the continuing adventures of the DC Greens. Thanks for leaving me a note, I do appreciate it!
Marzee
Hi, I would have been back earlier to read- but I had no time!
But now nothing can stop me! *laughs*
Ok, let’s start… ;)
Wow… that was a very long, nice, intense conversation they had… I so would hope that April’s sisters and all the Lisinski’s are ok, but I fear that’s too much to wish for… :(
Wow, so many Lisinski’s at once, Jake is really good in staying cool! *laughs*
And again I had to smile so much reading all those German words amidst an English text… yeah, there’s nothing over a good piece of Leberkaese mit Senf (with mustard)! *beams*
Right into your face, Mark! Hah! *sticks tongue out*
That really was a very nice love declaration from Jake! :)
And again - some quality time for our beloved couple... they love each other so much!
Loved to read all of that, each word, nice long as promised!
So thanks again for writing, I'm looking forward to chapter 15! *hugs*
I am very glad to hear that you enjoyed this part of Different Circumstances. Honestly, this "little" 14G was the culmination of a lot of planning that really goes back years. (As does the beginning of DC 14). Anyway, a lot of this part in particular is very neear and dear to my heart.... a set of important moments for our favorite couple. They really do love each other very much, and they are in for a roller coaster ride, so I thought it was important to get them to a really good place so they can face what's coming secure in and bolstered by that love.
Okay, enough with the deep thought. It was nice to see Jake take Mark down a peg or two, wasn't it? That's a scene I'd been waiting a couple years to write! And the German menu was fun to write, though it made me hungry!
Thanks so much for reviewing.
Marzee
Hah! Found your new entry! *beams*
And the famous tank scene! Love it... :)
Ugggghhhhh - that bad smell... I almost could smell it... *feels somehow sick*
Poor guys who had to drive that tank!
As for the wedding papers - so cute how Jake told Heather that those papers are not important to him, that he will do everything gladly for her as long as it means he can marry her and be with her until they are 100 years old... or something like that... Awwww! :)
And as for the icecold shower... yuck!
Poor guy still has more ice than blood in his venes and you let him take an icecold shower! Tsk...
As ever, I loved your new chapter!
And you really need a 14G????? Wow! Can't wait to read it!
Thanks for writing! ;)
Thanks, Shadowflame!
That tank was pretty gross, wasn't it? I really did feel bad for doing that to the guys, but I had to figure that it was pretty well lived in by that point. And, I just couldn't see a way around Jake taking a shower.
You summed up Jake's reaction to the wedding paperwork perfectly. He'll sign whatever he has to sign in order to marry Heather. And wouldn't that make any of us melt? :-)
Thank you so much for taking the time to review. Much appreciated!
*squeals* Yay!!!!!! :)
Since I saw yesterday that you have updated I couldn't wait to find time to read!!!!
Now, here I am and thanks so much for the special shout out - I feel so honoured!
Hopefuly your "Come back" will give me that much needed inspiration to come to my feet and do something, too... like at least posting finally my little stuff here even if my muse will not return for something new... *coughs*
Ok, now, I stop talking and start reading!!!! :)
"Ignoring what was going on around her, Maggie leaned over Michael, shaking him. “Mike, c’mon, Mike. Please wake up,” she begged quietly.
“You could always try kissin’ him.” Maggie looked up and glared at Jake as he sauntered toward them, “I’m pretty sure he’d like that.” Stopping at Michael’s feet, he tapped the bottom of his brother-in-law’s shoe with the toe of his own boot. “Hey, c’mon, sleeping beauty, time to get up.”"
--> Yes Jake, that would be a good idea, Mike really would love it, I'm sure!!!! *snickers*
""Michael heaved a sigh, muttering, “Guess we all can’t have a truck fall on us.”
“That’s Jake for you, Mike,” Eric said, joining the other three. “Always wins in the injury department,” he complained, offering Michael a hand. The younger man hesitated a second – no doubt weighing his loyalty to April against accepting his assistance, Eric thought – but then he took it, letting Eric help him to his feet.
“Pretty much,” Jake agreed, “Except for that time Heather got you in the nose playing football. You talked like Elmer Fudd for a week.”""
--> Hahaha, that really made me laugh... and yeah... not easy to beat Jake with the injuries, I swear! ;)
""Gray let out a humorless bark of laughter. "Well, you know, like I used to tell Stevens, you know the deal's done when everybody feels a little bit screwed."""
--> Well, I don't like the deal!!!! Especially not after giving a firework AND feeding the little the town had left only to the fake Marines and the upper class! And that sentence sounds so like Gray... you nailed him here! At least like he was in the beginning... I always started to like Gray in the end, I think he came around... but in the beginning... shame on you! *scowls*
--> Hahahaha, of course Jake would have loved to play Twister with Heather... *wiggles eyebrows and laughs*
""Although her brothers were at least fifteen seconds behind Heather, they arrived in the living room – along with their father – in plenty of time to get a good show. With the three Lisinski wives following behind, there was nearly a pile-up in the arch the separated the living and dining rooms when Michael, John and Andrew came to a very sudden stop, gaping at their sister and her fiancé.
"Ew, Dad!" Michael protested, "Aren't you going to make this stop?""
--> *giggles* I so can see that!
"""You went to the bathroom on New Year's, and my Mom and April both took the opportunity to smack me and tell me in no uncertain terms that I was to drop it," he informed Heather, squeezing her hand. "I'm supposed to let you enjoy being a bride."""
--> LOL, and that, too!!!!
Awwww... that's so cute that the proposal story and that Heather giggled so much finally won the Lisinski-Men over and it seems they will accept Jake! Only one Lisinski left now, right? ;)
"""C'mon, Tommy," Andrew admonished, turning a bratwurst. ""
--> Jeeez - really - you call it "Bratwurst" in the USA, too????? That's so german! Made me laugh so much!!! Cool! ;)
And it looks like Andrew steps a bit in for Jake?????
""He'd thought about it for a moment before pulling her close, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing the tip of her nose. "Deal," he'd sighed softly, offering her a lopsided grin. "Long as you're there with me, having three kids probably won't kill me."""
--> so cute!!!!! :)
"""We're not having pizza, and I don't think you're gonna really like beer until they make it coffee flavored."""
--> ok, that sounds interesting, I think then I maybe could start liking a beer, too!
“”Jake pulled the door open and looked in at them. "Hey. We need our last marine so we can get this show on the road."
Maggie wouldn't look at Michael. "That's my cue," she sighed.””
--> oh no…. really… despite I didn’t like Jake kissing her in the show I always liked Maggie… and I didn’t like that she had to leave town with the others… And now for sure I don’t like her going – she would be so nice for Mike!
“” "But I do like you," she said attempting a smile and failing miserably. "It wouldn't work, not after the story we told. And not with story you're all plannin' to tell."””
--> yeah… how shall that work? *sigh*
Ohhhhh – another part will come up! Love it!!!! *beams*
Thanks so much for writing again… loved every word of it!!!!
And now you get a load of hugs & kisses from Germany… xxx ooo :)
Thanks so much for reviewing Shadowflame!
"Ignoring what was going on around her, Maggie leaned over Michael, shaking him. “Mike, c’mon, Mike. Please wake up,” she begged quietly.
“You could always try kissin’ him.” Maggie looked up and glared at Jake as he sauntered toward them, “I’m pretty sure he’d like that.” Stopping at Michael’s feet, he tapped the bottom of his brother-in-law’s shoe with the toe of his own boot. “Hey, c’mon, sleeping beauty, time to get up.”"
--> Yes Jake, that would be a good idea, Mike really would love it, I'm sure!!!! *snickers*
Jake knows Mikey very well. :-) But he really is trying to help.
""Gray let out a humorless bark of laughter. "Well, you know, like I used to tell Stevens, you know the deal's done when everybody feels a little bit screwed."""
--> Well, I don't like the deal!!!! Especially not after giving a firework AND feeding the little the town had left only to the fake Marines and the upper class! And that sentence sounds so like Gray... you nailed him here! At least like he was in the beginning... I always started to like Gray in the end, I think he came around... but in the beginning... shame on you! *scowls*
The deal is a bad one, but I wanted to give a plausible explanation for how we get to One Man's Terrorist a little bit down the road. But yeah, Gray really needs to grow into his job, doesn't he?
Awwww... that's so cute that the proposal story and that Heather giggled so much finally won the Lisinski-Men over and it seems they will accept Jake! Only one Lisinski left now, right? ;)
The Lisinski brothers definitely are starting to come around. They've never seen their sister like this… it's an eye-opening experience for them. :-)
"""C'mon, Tommy," Andrew admonished, turning a bratwurst. ""
--> Jeeez - really - you call it "Bratwurst" in the USA, too????? That's so german! Made me laugh so much!!! Cool! ;)
And it looks like Andrew steps a bit in for Jake?????
Yes, we absolutely have bratwurst here in the U.S. :-) Additionally, in my backstory for Heather, her mother is 100% of German descent, so the Lisinski kids know their German food at the very least. As for Andrew, yes I think he's willing to give Jake the benefit of the doubt…. But he better not mess up anywhere along the way!
--> oh no…. really… despite I didn’t like Jake kissing her in the show I always liked Maggie… and I didn’t like that she had to leave town with the others… And now for sure I don’t like her going – she would be so nice for Mike!
I had the same reaction to Maggie…. Stay away from Jake! But I really think you're an interesting character. So it was nice that I could reconcile that all by slipping Mikey into those scenes instead. We will see Maggie again…. We'll just have to see if Mikey sees Maggie again. :-)
Marzee, I'm glad to see the next chapter posted! I found this part was really full of emotional ups and downs. Here are some of the parts I especially liked:
Quote:
“He threw her a look that clearly questioned her sanity. “And what?” he growled, “Wait for him to tell the whole town when we’re half a mile out? It’d be Greenville all over again,” he predicted grimly.
A shudder ran through Maggie. “But we’re not killers,” she argued.
“I was a P.E. teacher who saw too many movies,” Hill snorted, “So now I’m a Marine. I’m adapting.””
This really got to me, and their dilemma seemed really real and I wished they could be okay too, at the same time as I want them to leave the Jericho residents unharmed. I don't always focus a lot on the fake Marines when I watch “Semper Fidelis,” because of course they're clearly a malevolent Trojan horse kind of threat and we just want our protagonists to figure it out in time, and I guess we don't really get to see things from their POV that much and when we do, we see the hardened, super pragmatic attitude Hill shows here. Maggie is really our only window into whatever vulnerability and tragedy they also carry with them, and I like how you showcase her here. You use the stuff that we saw on the show, but add the extra commentary (Hill looks at her like she's crazy, which is true in the narrative they've been living in all the time we haven't seen them, and Maggie just wanting a return to the life she led before where her instinct for right wasn't a luxury) that gives us a window, however brief, into what's going on for these outsiders, and when I think about it, even the contrasting views Hill and Maggie show each make sense for them in their particular life narrative at this moment. It's interesting, the way “Semper Fidelis” and “One Man's Terrorist,” two episodes so close together, present us these two different narratives of a group of outsiders who have been living an entirely different kind of struggle since the bombs, and in both cases we see them fitting in the roles of antagonists or threats, but then there are those moments where something happens to shift how we and the characters view them. These windows in, where everything you think is really transformed. I never really thought much about these two stories being so close together, so parallel in some ways and going in completely different directions in other ways. I look forward to seeing how you incorporate the second outsider story into your alternate universe.
Quote:
"Okay," the mayor muttered, momentarily distracted. "Okay, okay," he began again, his attention focused on Johnston. "So I agree to do this your way, you're all gonna do somethin' my way. Those refugees that Roger Hammond brought here, they hafta accept half rations until relief –"
"Half rations?" Jake repeated, incredulous. "That's – that's a death sentence for fifty, sixty people!"
"You wanna have somethin' to eat in a month?" Gray demanded, "Food for your wife, your mom? This is the price."
"Better to cut 'em off totally," Stanley argued. "At least if they had to leave, they'd have a chance."
"But we do that, we lose our X factor," Johnston sighed. "This – this is the only way."
Gray let out a humorless bark of laughter. "Well, you know, like I used to tell Stevens, you know the deal's done when everybody feels a little bit screwed."
Speaking of, I do like the foreshadowing here. What a conflict these guys are in for, and don't even know how much so. I liked the handling of this discussion, and though of course the Greens (and Brett) seem more right in this particular argument (and I'm glad they all recognized the need for some people beyond even their particular nearest and dearest knowing something so important for all their survival, instead of keeping that important info in the hands of one small group), they are all still struggling with a looming decision for which there are no satisfactory answers. Everybody's wrong and right, I think (even Gray).
Quote:
"Ew, Dad!" Michael protested, "Aren't you going to make this stop?"
"Yeah, that's – that's against house rules," John insisted.
Deborah threaded her way between her husband and father-in-law and entered the living room, depositing a bowl of potato chips and a tub of bacon ranch dip on the coffee table. She shook her head at the couple. "You two," she complained fondly.
Joe Lisinski knew that his sons believed that Heather was his favorite child, and while it wasn't true – not really – it was true that his relationship with his daughter was different from that with his sons. There were times when she was completely unfathomable to him, but more often he felt that he understood Heather the best of all his children. And this was one of those times. Her brothers' teasing over her relationship with Jake, the fact that they had treated her falling in love as if it were a joke, their idle threats to interrogate him – these things had all worn on Heather, and she certainly wasn't above getting a little payback. "I'm not seeing anything I haven't walked in on before in this house, Andy-Deb-Mandy-John-Kerry," Joe responded, "And," he continued, catching his daughter's eye, "I think your sister might be trying to torture you all, just a little bit."
LOL! Not allowed to play Twister and they think they can get away with this? I did like Joe's response. As a sister of brothers, I am sensitive to double standards and it's always weird to occupy the (real or supposed) “different” place in your family that being an “only” gives you. I like that Joe understands Heather the individual and recognizes the ways in which they are alike. Another layer of this neat relationship you have given her in the past scenes.
Quote:
“Tommy was carrying two beers, but he handed one off to Michael, then offered Jake his hand. "Nice to meetcha." Taking a drink, he studied Jake silently – appraisingly – then glanced at his older brother, joking, "You getting a lotta good barbeque advice from a real cowboy, huh?"
"C'mon, Tommy," Andrew admonished, turning a bratwurst. "Jake's cool." Out of the corner of his eye he saw his youngest brother take a swig from the bottle Tommy had given him, and he shook his head. "Mike –" Andrew began, his voice terse. He stopped himself, and settled for advising, "Just don't let Dad or Deb see, okay?"
"Oh, give 'im a break, Andy," Tommy argued gruffly. "It's just a beer, and it's not like we're leavin' the property."
"And Dad would've given you or me hell for the same thing," Andrew reminded. He looked at Jake. "Heather went so easy on Dad when she was a teenager, he completely let down his guard and Mike can basically get away with murder now. Though," he continued, frowning softly as he glanced between Michael and Jake, "You don't have to arrest him or something?"
"Sorry," Jake told him, shrugging. "I'm not on the clock, and alcohol's not really in my job description. I'm DEA, that's ATF," he explained, "And even the ATF's more worried about illegal trafficking and whether all the right taxes have been paid." Jake took a drink, and then added, "Besides, I try to avoid arresting anybody for something I've done myself. But," he finished, glancing at Michael, "Don't let Heather see either."
"Well, I'm not an idiot," Michael huffed softly.”
I enjoyed the scenes with Jake meeting the various Lisinski brothers in the past. They struck a nice balance between humour and the awkwardness of meeting new people and being immersed in a specific group of people's culture, trying to find ways you fit into it and figure out what the unspoken rules are while still being yourself, and that added cautiousness you get when the people are really close to someone you're really close to. I liked how their different personalities come across in little ways (Tommy the joker, Andrew the responsible leader, Mikey trying to fit in and assert himself among his elders).
Quote:
"You know, Mike," Zack threw out, "You should take a shift now and then with the border patrol. Like Jeff," he added, "Keep your skills up."
Michael nodded, not sure how else to respond. He really had never held an actual, shoots bullets, gun – had never wanted to – but it was starting to seem pretty foolish not to learn how to use one if only so he had one more way to feed and protect himself and others. It'd be a little embarrassing, but he decided then that he'd ask Jake to teach him. Certainly he'd suffered other – even worse – humiliations in front of his brother-in-law and survived. "Yeah, good idea," he muttered, "Keep my skills up."
Poor Mikey! Well, you already know how I feel about the youngest Lisinski brother, I am already likely to sympathize with him, but I really liked his moments in this scene. He's at a strange moment of transition in his life, in this time, and I like seeing the ways he tries to hold onto his humanity and the ways he chooses to be as a survivor while at the same time adapting to the rules of each new place he finds himself. I have a feeling I'm going to be saying “Poor Mikey” more in the future, but I also think he's likely to be go through everything and come out different but okay, if he's made it this far and is still holding onto so much of his former self (and rising to occasions in the present too).
Quote:
"It's not gonna work," she interrupted, frowning at him. They were far enough from town hall and the crowd that they didn't really need to maintain the charade, and Maggie adjusted her weapon – her empty, useless weapon – so that she wore it over her shoulder by its strap. "I almost wish I didn't like you so much, Mike," she told him, looking at him sideways and blinking hard. "If I didn't, I could just stay here, and let the chips fall where they may. One hundred percent After Maggie," she admitted. "But I do like you," she said attempting a smile and failing miserably. "It wouldn't work, not after the story we told. And not with story you're all plannin' to tell."
"But –"
"Please, Mike. Let me – just let me be Before Maggie again, okay?" she requested, her voice cracking with a suppressed sob. "Anyway, she's the one you like."
Aw, Maggie! I will try not to sound like a broken record, but I always feel for Maggie. Her story is so interesting and sad, and so little focused on in the main story of Jericho. I always wanted to know what happened to her (though I assumed she didn't make it), and thought her particular position in the post-bombs world was so tragic and so pertinent really to so many of us who don't live in a small town, surrounded by family and friends, without a practical training in survival. I really like the glimpses you give us into her mind and the somber sort of resignation she has here. It makes sense she cuts loose from the other fake marines after this, and her ability to survive as a single agent this far is so impressive, but I still fear a Russian tragedy outcome may be on the horizon for her.
Looking forward to see how you close out this chapter!
Penny,
As always, thanks so much for reviewing. I always learn something about my own story from your comments. It's great to have someone who can look at what I've done with fresh eyes. I truly appreciate that you do that for me!
Quote:
Gray let out a humorless bark of laughter. "Well, you know, like I used to tell Stevens, you know the deal's done when everybody feels a little bit screwed."
Speaking of, I do like the foreshadowing here. What a conflict these guys are in for, and don't even know how much so. I liked the handling of this discussion, and though of course the Greens (and Brett) seem more right in this particular argument (and I'm glad they all recognized the need for some people beyond even their particular nearest and dearest knowing something so important for all their survival, instead of keeping that important info in the hands of one small group), they are all still struggling with a looming decision for which there are no satisfactory answers. Everybody's wrong and right, I think (even Gray).
I always felt like I was blindsided when the half rations thing came up in One Man's Terrorist, so since I had the opportunity to show how that might have come about here, I went for it. And it seemed to tie nicely in with the beginning of this part of Different Circumstances (which has taken me entirely too long to put together). But, yes, it is a tough situation with no good or easy answers. :-(
LOL! Not allowed to play Twister and they think they can get away with this? I did like Joe's response. As a sister of brothers, I am sensitive to double standards and it's always weird to occupy the (real or supposed) “different” place in your family that being an “only” gives you. I like that Joe understands Heather the individual and recognizes the ways in which they are alike. Another layer of this neat relationship you have given her in the past scenes.
Well, I don't know if Heather thought she was going to get away with anything, but she certainly knows how to throw down the gauntlet, don't you think? I have really enjoyed inventing the Lisinskis, so it makes my day to hear that Joe and Heather have a "neat relationship". Thank you!
I enjoyed the scenes with Jake meeting the various Lisinski brothers in the past. They struck a nice balance between humour and the awkwardness of meeting new people and being immersed in a specific group of people's culture, trying to find ways you fit into it and figure out what the unspoken rules are while still being yourself, and that added cautiousness you get when the people are really close to someone you're really close to. I liked how their different personalities come across in little ways (Tommy the joker, Andrew the responsible leader, Mikey trying to fit in and assert himself among his elders).
You don't mention poor John! Never fear, he gets his moment soon….
As for Maggie and Mikey, they are my truly star-crossed, just couldn't happen couple. Actually, I was most worried about posting this part because of them – I think I was really, really mean to them. :-( And I adore Mikey, so it kills me to break his heart. I will definitely have to try and make it up to him later…. Hopefully Maggie too.
Hm... first I want to say some things which pricked me when they all sat down and ate what little they had left with the marines... Being happy about the news is one thing... but as a "common", half-starved citizen of Jericho I would have put on a full rebellion when I had realized that the "High Society" of Jericho was dining with the Marines!!!!
And as for the firework... Gosh... that must have been seen from everywhere in the plains! For each starving person on the treck to south, for each road gang that should have been a signal that there must be a place out there which still has enough live and energy (and food and enough of everything???) to make a firework!!!! Its like sitting in a fishbowl and waving with all you can reach to show each person out there where Jericho is!
For this stupid idea alone I so would have liked to kill Gray...
So, but now back to your story!
I like rice in combination with potatoes... ;)
*g* This one I like:
""And I'd avoid doing that," Deborah said a good ten or fifteen seconds later. "That lost-in-your-eyes, no-one-else-in-the-world thing," she added, waving her hand widely in the couple's direction, not that it appeared to register with either of them. "It's really, really hard not to notice." She paused a moment. "Really, the type of thing that'll send them all over the edge...."""
Ahhh... Maggie... *sigh* ... and poor Michael... he really has no luck with women... :(
Can't wait to read more!
o.O No, wait... I reached the end, didn't I????? Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!
*gets a panic attack* o.O
Need more!!!!! Pretty pretty please? ;)
Shadowflame,
First, thank you so much for reading my the whole thing (so far) and leaving me such lovely feedback. It really was a signifcant reason I went back to writing. (Having my parents recover from their health problems and things easing up at work helped too.) But I truly appreciate that there's at least one person out there who wants to know what happens next.
For anyone else who's been waiting nearly 2 years for the next part, I can only apologize and thank you for hanging in and checking back every once in awhile. The next part is coming soon, I promise. :-)
I hope you can bear with me, there's more Michael/Maggie coming... I was glad to have someone to substitute in there for Jake, and Mikey seemed like a really good fit. I always liked Maggie (despite Jake's interest in her ;-) ) and Michael/Maggie has grown on me, so look for more.
Lastly, I have to agree with you, Shadowflame.... what were they thinking when they set those fireworks off? And, also it was pretty mean to throw a dinner and invite almost no one to it aside from the marines. My dear friend and sometime collaborator has made the common, every day citizen of Jericho argument to me more than once, and it is very compelling. But, these are also the people -- some of them anyway -- who voted for Gray. What were they thinking?
Thanks again for all the reviews. They are muchly appreciated and the best fodder for a fanficcer like me. :-)
Marzee
I like the idea of placing Michael instead of Jake with Maggie! And Michael seems smitten... poor guy will not like what he will learn, soon... :(
And Heather's family is just awesome... *laughs*
I love being able to stick my beak into those family moments! :)
And it looks like that Jake is at least winning Joe over... the girls he has already on his side... now we need to see what Heather's brothers have to say! ;)
Awwww... Stanley... you really gave me goosebumps and made me cry reading how his parents died and how the Greens were there for him... *sniffs*
Maggie... I really was annoyed when Jake at the show responded to her, somehow connected to her... but I like her... ;)
Loved the scenes with Jake and Heather's sisters-in-law, especially the "withhold something if need to" and Jake with Hannah on his lap!
You made me really squeal with that one:
"Oh, take it," Leslie advised. She hadn't said anything for awhile, but she'd been following the conversation closely all the same. "For all of us stuck back here in Buffalo who will just have to make do with memories of our 'My Little Pony' collections," she joked.
My little Pony!!!! *laughs at that*
You can't know it... but I'm actually a collector of those ones... have more than 700 of them here... *snickers*
And in another fan base for another great show I had been known as "the german Pony Doctor" because I can restore those old lovely ponies, give 'em new hair and eyes and so on... *laughs*
Now you connected my beloved Ponies with Jericho, that's so fab!!!! *jumps up and down* :)
And I'm glad that Jake finally opened up to Heather... he needs to tell her, about that attack... and about so much more...
Loved it, good chapter! :)
Ha, I love it that the towns council still stands up against Gray... *snickers* ;)
And the Marines... *sigh*
I was really devastated after that ep... had my hopes flying high with them...
Ohhh - the scene in the plane was sweet!
And I wonder what Heathers brothers have planned for Jake... *snickers*
I always seem to come back to this story at this time of year :). I've been rereading the whole thing over the last few weeks, and it feels like I'm catching up with old friends. I've always enjoyed the level of detail and insight you give into the characters we know, even though they are alternate-universed here.
I just wanted to post to let you know I'm still reading and enjoying the story, even if it takes me a while to catch up and I'm terrible at leaving timely responses. Happy holidays and best wishes for the new year.
Glad to see another chapter of your story Marzee!
One of the things you do that I really like is how you include a lot of little true to life details in a scene that add texture and dimension to it. Some of the moments/details that I liked in this part:
Quote:
"My Mom invented the snowstorm picnic to give us all something to do if the power went out. Dad always had to go into work of course, even if we still had electricity it was pretty much guaranteed to be out somewhere," she explained."
I love the idea of the snowstorm picnic! Sounds like fun and the kind of weird, individual tradition a family would have. It develops the Lisinski family's playfulness that we've already seen in earlier scenes.
Quote:
"Yeah, I took Jake to see the Falls," Heather answered, seating herself and accepting the cupcake that Mandy passed her way. "Went into Canada, which was fine. Fun. But lucky we had lunch there because coming back was ridiculous. Took almost two hours!" she complained. "I mean I'm used to traffic on the bridge delaying things but I've never gotten the third degree the way I did today."
"Right," Deborah acknowledged, her nose wrinkling. "I haven't been over since..." She paused for a significant few seconds and then clearing her throat, added, "You know.
I like the way these really time and space specific details are somewhat in the background here, but hinting at a big thing happening for the characters at the time. Specific people at a specific time of their life, but linked to a cultural moment all the universe's characters (and us readers) experienced. We know how what happened is on their minds, influencing how they feel, even if they say barely anything about it, and it gives the 'present day' scenes an interesting contrast but also continuity. Bigger, sadder events were intruding on this somewhat insulated moment of family fun, just as the bigger, somewhat harsher outside world is about to intrude on the dinner at town hall. It's neat.
Quote:
"My maiden name's McKisson," she explained, catching Jake's eye, "Which trust me, you don't find on coat of arms plaques in gift shops anywhere, even Ireland, plus naturally all the boys called me Mandy McKisser from like fifth grade on. Half the reason I wouldn't go to Homecoming with Steven Hurlbutt when he asked me. What if I'd fallen in love with him? No way I was gonna marry out of McKisser and into Hurlbutt."
Poor Mandy McKisser! Though I would say I've heard a couple more unfortunate names than that, this made me laugh. There is a particular kind of pathos evoked by memories of what people do to our names in childhood I think. It could be something not even that bad but that very specific indignity could be very haunting. I don't blame her for wanting to stay away from Hurlbutt!
To comment on a bigger picture kind of thing, I really like the way you weave together these scenes with contrasting emotional levels. There's the mostly easy-going, happy occasion in the past and the uneasy present, and the kinds of conversations they're having (reminiscing, teasing, but hiding some things in the past and the trying to be jovial but hiding things in anothe specific way in the present) are juxtaposed in a neat way.
Lastly, I was intrigued by the Maggie versus Michael showdown at the end. On the one hand, poor Mikey! It's interesting how his reasons for approaching Maggie are different from Jake's but also make sense given what we have learned about him so far, though I imagine he may be in for further heartache. It's interesting to see the contrast between him, as a survivor still trying to be vulnerable in a sense while trying to steel himself against the kind of desperate actions Maggie might have had to take, with the imposter marine herself. I've always liked and sympathized with Maggie, trying to survive with no one to help her but herself, wandering through a world she can't seem to find her place in. Maybe because of his specific circumstances, Mike might be able to understand this about her and see past the threat she poses but this very difference might also be what makes them unable to compromise.
Thanks for the thought-provoking read!
Thank you for the feedback, Penny. You know how valuable I think your opinions are. :-)
And thank you for writing about Mikey. He is my favorite original character and the little brother I always wanted (as opposed to the one I got), so naturally he holds a very special place in my heart. I've very protective and a very proud big sister when anyone wants to talk about my little bro.
I liked Maggie, too... not for Jake, but I think she can work for Mikey. You're the one who convinced me that she's a graduate student turned refugee/fake marine, and that really helps me see the two of them as similar, two peas in one slightly mightmarish pod. Anyway, I don't think this is the last we will see of the Maggie and Mikey dynamic...
Thank you!
Marzee
You are a fantastic writer. Any plans to continue this story? (I hope so!!)
Thanks, Miss Mary!
I do have plans to continue Different Circumstances (I certainly have enough of the story in me to go on for years). Unfortunately, I am coming off a summer in which both my parents had major surgery and it was Nurse Marzee to the rescue. But now that they're both on the mend -- and since Jake and Heather keep telling me more of their story -- I can hopefully find some time to write. :-)
Thank you again, and welcome to GoJ!
This is the most awesome story ever read the whole thing over about 3 days.
Love the way you track through Heather and Jakes early relationship and then skip back to the future. And how you tie in the past to the present.
Love your EJ and the characterizations of all the Jericho natives and I love Jeff, Drake and Michael.
Though I haven't watched jericho in awhile I know the April episode is coming up, please don't kill April! hoping for a April/Jeff or April/Drake pairing, and looking forward to more whatever you choose to write cause you are an awesome writer (even if you do decide to kill April) Thanks for a wonderful story so far :)
cassada,
So sorry, I seem to have missed responding to you! I apologize.
I'm glad you enjoyed readong my little story, and I promise there is more coming. April is a big dilemma for me and I don't want to give anything away but trust me whan I say that I've thought this story through all the way. (I pretty much know what happens up until Baby Green gets married, if you can believe that.) So hopefully when I get to that part -- and I will get there -- you will appreciate how I handle it.
Thanks for leaving feedback, and again, I am so srry I missed responding.
Marzee
I can't even begin to tell you how excited I was to see that you had updated this. I'm sorry the past 18 months have been so hectic, but I'm thrilled that you've returned to writing DC.
The sisters-in-law cracked me up. The details you put in your story make these characters absolutely pop off the computer screen and seem so real, which is a pretty spectacular feat, considering they are original characters. Same goes for Mike. Sometimes when I read about him, he seems like he really was the one right there in the thick of the action on the show, even though he wasn't. And now you've got me all worried for him! LOL. Surely you won't let anything too terrible happen to him. Pretty please?
And Jake being accosted by the little kids? Awwww.
Thank you so much for treating us to a new chapter!
Your timing is perfect! I pushed the "return to story" button, and viola! But another cliffhanger?? Arg!
Love the 5-years-ago parts. They couldn't avoid the "lost in your eyes" moments to save themselves, cound they?! The sisters-in-law are funny.
Again, thanks for writing, and I hope to see more soon!!
Oh, and you left us with a cliffhanger!
Loved hearing about the Lisinski family's early years. I'm glad they like Jake!
Looking forward to more installments!!
Loved hearing the story of the senior Richmonds. Very sad; made a lot of sense.
"Five years old, knew the whole alphabet and was not afraif to use it!" Great line! Sounds like my little one, may have to borrow it for her scrapbook.
Maggie & Michael ~ who would have thought?! I'm glad Heather & Jake are tallking again!
I think I'll save the last installment for tomorrow . . . *Ü*
I can't tell you how relieved I am that the hunters bagged a couple of deer, and that there was another food drop. I have been obsessing over what they would eat, lol! I was remembering Bonnie's rabbit project of 5 years ago . . . I also loved the way the town council members handled Gray and the chickens/garden/farmers issue. Strong work!
The various scenes surrounding Jake & Heather's engagement are adorable!! Looking forward to seeing how Jake's "meet the family" weekend goes!!
Almost caught up ~ so sad! Hope you're still working on those additional chapters *Ü*
Happy Thanksgiving!!
I have just recently started watching the Jericho series and I instantly fell in love with it. I love to read so i looked up some Jericho fanfiction and instantly became a heather/jake fan. I have to tell you though this work of art that you have produced in my opinion dwarfs the original idea in its brilliance.
Your advancement of the plot and following the actual show is amazing, as is the changes in the original plot to allow the relationship between heather and jake to change. I must give you kudos and say that if you ever publish something of your own let me know. I would enjoy reading it.
Another wonderful chapter, Marzee Doats! I read it shortly after it was posted and wanted to write a review then, but time limitations prohibited me from doing so at that time...and then things got busier. So sorry it's taken so long to tell you what a jewel this was!
I loved your take on the faux Marines. I thought this storyline had some nice touches, from Gray scrambling to get supplies for them, weighing the costs and benefits, to the chemistry that popped off the screen between Maggie and Michael. I found myself wishing that Maggie would give up the charade and stay there with him, but I am looking forward to (perhaps) seeing her again in New Bern and after. I'll enjoy seeing where you take these two in the future.
And Jake and Heather in Buffalo... yeah, I knew the Lisinski siblings weren't going to make it easy for their only sister. There were so many parts that brought a smile to my face, from the Lisinski Home for Wayward boys to "engaged's not married." I thought Jake handled himself well with Joe, though having knowledge of what's to come (and knowing that his work does take him away from Heather eventually) does add an extra layer of interest when reading those scenes. It's fascinating to read how the character perceive their lives will be and compare that to what we know did/does happen.
I also enjoyed what you did with the Optimus Prime references. It also made me laugh and smile.
Thank you so much for such an enjoyable installment. Your combination of wit, heart, and character development always leaves me wanting more.
Nice chapter, Marzee! It seemed very approriate for this wintery day, for some reason, as I'm watching a winter storm move in, and this chapter was a nice snowy evening read.
I enjoyed the scene at the hockey rink, in the past, as Jake had a quick introduction by fire to the family, being left holding the baby in what, the first twenty minutes? Very humorous and fun dynamic to the scene, with the sisters-in-law triple threat added to by the cousin and family friend. As someone who grew up with a large extended family with a lot more boys than girls, I can only imagine how phase two of this introduction will go.
I liked Maggie's appearance here. I think you've captured her wry survivor-sense-of-humour in her expressions and reactions to things, and have just the right combination of that humour and hints at more going on underneath Maggie's survivor's shield of armour. The interaction between her and Mikey was interesting, they do have certain things in common, but this part really amused me:
Bill had scrounged a couple of tool kits - one with a soldering iron that still worked - from the storeroom and had brought them into the office, blushing and stammering as he'd presented them to Maggie, much to her amusement. "Well, thank you, Deputy," she's acknowledged as he'd nearly tripped over a chair, backing out of the room.
Looks like Corporal Mullin's got herself an admirer. In seriousness, though, I have a soft spot for this character, she was so interesting and vulnerable, and so I liked her inclusion here, and was happy to see she now has a category on this site!
I also have to mention I liked the little backstory into the Richmonds here, and their friendship with the Greens. I so felt for poor Stanley as I heard about what was the worst night of his young life.
As always it was interesting to see the contrast between Jake and Heather of the past, dealing with what probably seem trivial issues in the present, uncomfortable encounters with ex's relatives and overwhelming introductions to sisters-in-law and infants, but still, those things are significant at the time, and so valid, but also in this case, funny. The present scene was poignant and I really felt for Jake, trying to deal with difficult, traumatic experiences in a time and place where, in a sense, he doesn't really get to deal because he has so much expected (or thinks he's got so much expected) of him. Not that people don't understand and want to help him, just that he's always, out of necessity, got to move on to the next thing. And though they do want to help him and understand, I think in a way they are depending on him to be strong for them, as he usually is. It was good that him and Heather did take a moment then, to talk about how they felt instead of trying to brave through it.
The chapter had a good balance of humorous and more serious present moments. I enjoyed it and look forward to the next!
Marzee Doats, oh how I missed this story! I always get so excited when I see what you've updated because I know I'm in for a treat, and this installment was no exception.
5 Years Ago:
Jake is such a good sport! The Lisinski clan--with all their varying traits--have one thing in common: their love for Heather. It was so funny to me that there was talk of the Lisinski brothers essentially hazing Jake considering the women certainly did their part. It was cute the way that saddled him with the baby--and the panic that ensued. I mean, here's a guy who has taken on the bad guys through his job, and an infant scares him. Heehee...
Also enjoyed the double meanings in the conversations with the women (all that confusion about baseball) and Jake defending Heather's honor when the talk turned to scars.
PRESENT
I have to admit that I was very curious how you would handle the fake Marines aspect of the show. I like your take on it with the inclusion of Mike into the Maggie mix.
Something else I really liked was getting insight into the Richmond family history. With your vivid words, I could just imagine Johnston showing up and approaching Stanley in the college cafeteria. :( This trip down memory lane really helped to strengthen the reasons behind Johnston's resolve that Gray not take advantage of Stanley or the other farmers.
And the Jake/Heather conflict...I really feel for Heather and Jake both. She wants so much to be a sounding board for him, and the fact that he was talking with another woman whereas he has not been confiding in her is very hurtful. On the other hand, I'd say that Jake's lack of attachment to Maggie is what enabled him to talk to her. Sometimes it's easier to talk to strangers than it is the ones we love for the simple reason that we want to protect those who matter to us. It was good to see him finally share some of what he'd been holding in to Heather. The love that he expressed for her and B.G. was very sweet.
At the same time, Jake's still carrying a monumental load on his shoulders. I hope the time will come when he will be able to share this with Heather.
I have to say, your chapter made me laugh out loud and alternately tear up. Definitely worth the wait! Thank you for sharing it with us!